Posted by: Leo 20600788
I was so upset yesterday after church. Let me share the story:
In one of the classes I am taking, the professor want us to work in teams. This is a great idea, since I heard that team work in Korean education is not so efficient.I understand that team work is difficult but sometimes this team setting can lead to frustration.
Well, I am inside of one of those teams and we are trying to work together and meet each other better.I think I am known in campus as a kind of "obsesive guy" with time and responsability. I usually like to be on time in meetings and if I am getting late for an appointment I just send message to all my team to inform them that I am late. I consider a lack of respect to my mates if I do not reply emails or sms as soon I got them.
Well, our team were supposed to schedule meeting, and on Saturday morning I send sms to my four team mates to ask when they could meet... One of them did not reply me in the whole day.
Next day, after church I saw that classmate and I said : "hey, I sent you message yesterday and I was waiting your reply to confirm about our meeting tomorrow".
The answer was: "Yes, I got it. But I did not have time to reply you"
-Ok, but later on, during the day you could reply because it is important to know if all team can meet.
- I did not have time the whole day.
-(My face started to feel irritated) You know what? There is always 30 seconds to answer to sms, there is no excuse. Please next time be sure to answer, we need to communicate efficiently as a team.
-(Team mate's face also irritated) But you don't understand other things and blah, blah...
After saying "see you tomorrow" I was praying to God to deal with my irritated moment, I was really upset.
I think the more I am living, the less tolerant I am to excuses.Sometimes I calm myself saying "Well, Leo, you were unresponsible before when you were your team mate's age" Yes, I keep saying myself, "but I did not have anyone who can get upset at me and tell me directly my mistake, because I would love to be taught by that time".
Therefore, after consideration I think that this team work experience is good, it help us to learn and to deal with people, and in my experience dealing with people is a stressful situations sometimes.
I pray God help me to be more patience and less irritated whenever I listen to excuses of lateness and absences and lack of responsability situations.
I was grown in a different setting and culture, and I want to understand Korean thoughts, but I also would love to be understood. To get another clue, I have learned my responsability from Jesus and also these kind of articles that I want to share with you:
Please take a look and let me know your opinion commenting my entry, thanks! Leo
1 comments:
First of all, I reckon you should've told me directly rather shared what happened with me on the other day. I totally agree with what you consider about time and reply to text message when we make an appointment. However, I guess you seem to show us pretty emotional response to others' behavior at a glance.
Firmly taking your own stand on a certain thing is good. As you shared about what you felt and what you belived important about time and teamwork, I have same ideas as yours or even stricter standard I might have. However, I do not normally force people around me to follw my rules, because each single person has his own standard that might be different from mine. Yet, I do know there are kinda general virtue that is regarded important amongst people. I understand you particularly do care about time and try to understand differences found between Korean and your background. I do too.
Nevertheless, it was not a pleasant thing to argue with you about this emotionally. You were kinda forcing me to fit in your standard that is 60secods to reply back to your message. If you really intended to persuade me, you shouldn't treated me that way. Plus, even if I gave you seemingly unreasonable excuse from your point of view, I did apologize that I couldn't reply back to you and gave you another reason that I wanted to make sure what were you speaking of Hisnet notice. If I always had postponed reply back to you, I would deserve being treated like what you are doing now.
However, I do not think it was wise choice to say things publically even with mentioning me. You might have thought that nobody would recognize who it was when you posted this article. It is obviously very offensive. If you really meant to share the idea about time with everyone including not only our teammates but all BS classmates, you could've done it in the other way.
I am not offensive to you, either I was not mad at you with that little argument. However, I wished you could have deeply pondered to post it or have some time to talk to me or even share it in the team meeting. My point is just talking about the manners you expressed your opinion here pulic blog. I would like you to talk about it in a meeting tomorrow and hope you don't take what I said too emotionally and too seriously.
Thanks
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